Books: Goals and Organization 2020

I have organized my books into categories:  To Re-read, Already Own/Started, To-Read from Library and Audiobooks.  I have a crazy amount of books that I already own.  I've decided to try to be a better steward of my resources and try to get any additional books from the library.

Already, I've established a caveat to this rule.  If I'm teaching a book based study I need to own it, in paperback.  I've tried to lead from the kindle (read cheaper) and I can't do it.  I can't see the page notations and page numbers in the same way.  I also can't get it from the library because I need it for such a long period of time.

So, for this year I have purchased:
Knowing God by J.I. Packer
Now, I have a copy from college that my husband has confiscated as his own, so having to purchase this new copy isn't really my fault.  We are going through this with our Faith Group and we generally try to share a copy but since the original is looking rather well-loved and is marked with all his personal notes we agreed I could get a new copy.  Initially, we got a study guide copy and it was horrible...gray, recycled paper and very hard to read.  I haven't read this book since college and now that I'm two chapter in I'm remembering why this is a highly recommended classic.
The Knowledge of the Holy by A.W. Tozer
I'm finishing out leading the attributes of God with my college girls group.

On deck from my already own/started list:
(this is not even a close representation of the real number of books in this category:-)
Comfort From The Cross by Elyse Fitzpatrick
This is a month's worth of short devotional readings.  Very gospel focused and encouraging!  I only have about two days left to finish this book.
Helper By Design by Elyse Fitzpatrick
I read about half of this and then decided to start back at the beginning because I was asked to consider leading a study on it and I want to read it more methodically than I was originally.  This has been super convicting but she has a great sense of humor so that helps lessen the blow a lot.
Pray With Your Eyes Open by Richard Packer
I would like to grow in my prayer life and this book came highly recommended from a pastor friend.
Suffering and the Sovereignty of God by Piper & Taylor
I was asked to read this in prep for teaching the attribute of Sovereignty for Tozer group above.

A lesser priority is my to read from library list:
Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy by Mark Vroegop
Recommended by a godly lady at church that I really respect and am encouraged by weekly.  She said it helped her grow in her prayer life.
Spiritual Disciplines by Don Whitney
A dear friend who buried a son and adopted a daughter this year highly recommended this book.  I have seen her suffer well and am excited to read this book that helped her in this incredible year.

Audiobooks are used when I'm cleaning so they are usually fiction:
I don't have a list per se...but I include any of my Agatha Christie collection that I haven't read off my bookshelf.  They are easy to find in audio book form and I don't have to concentrate too closely.

Re-reads are rare but often desired:
Ephesians: Our Immeasurable Blessings in Christ by MacArthur
I am using my notes from this study to aide me as the college sponsors go through Ephesians this semester.  I figure, why recreate the wheel.
Respectable Sins by Jerry Bridges
This isn't a long read and is highly convicting.  Might make it a morning devotional type read.

My plan is to make this blog start working for me.  I've grown to love listing and accountability logs so I'm going to start doing that with books and crafting.  Hopefully, giving a monthly report.

Pray. Wait. Trust. 2020

Every year I choose a word.  This word is something I study, pray over and use to help me strive to be more like Christ during the New Year.  Last year, my mentor, recommended a trifecta of words that I just loved...Grateful, Faithful, Steward...and they worked individually and together.  Being more Grateful for all I'd been given helped me be more Faithful with my time and talents and that led to me a be a better Steward of my gifts and abilities.  2019 was a good year.  

This year I've chosen Pray. Wait. Trust.  I've hesitated to choose this and thought of finding something else.  Trust makes me think of Patience...ya know, those things that people say, "be careful what you ask for, because the process is hard."  Then I laughed and thought about what a silly ninny I was being...like, "if I don't say it maybe God won't do it."  And if I cover my eyes He can't see me either.  *eye roll*  If I need to work on patience, He will make sure I do whether I ask for it or not.

One of my dearest quilting friends let me know her husband passed away yesterday.  A new year 'surprise' out of the blue.  I'm still stunned and my heart hurts.  Her response makes my heart swell..."Teach us to realize the brevity of life, so that we may grow in wisdom."  Ps. 90:12 AND "See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?  I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland." Is. 43:19  I dare say, this new thing God was bringing is stretching her understanding but she is faithfully moving forward.  

Although, I haven't fully put together how I will be studying on Pray. Wait. Trust.  I do know that our small group will be reading Knowing God by J.I. Packer and, Lord willing, I'll submit my counseling exam questions this Spring and pass and move on to supervised counseling (the last phase in getting certified).  I figured focus on prayer, waiting well and trusting God would be helpful.  Over all, I want to be like my friend who is choosing to trust God with everything...and keep her eyes on Him no matter what focus she may have thought she wanted.  God is good all the time.  All the time God is good.

Weary traveler...mundane faithfulness

After a flurry of summertime travels...barely unpacking in time to repack...the actual, looonnnngggg roads of driving...I'm SO tired.  I was more than slightly giddy to discover that the next overnight trip I have to take is at Christmastime.  Hooray!

There's probably something wrong with me.  Don't worry, I'm aware of this.  I need to learn to relax and enjoy the ride more...  Somehow learn to enjoy the disorganization more.  I need to plan relaxing things more.  Too uptight, probably.

Yes, it's good to be home.  The books, cupboards, drawers, clothes...everything is getting hauled out and sorted.  The calendar for the school year is getting filled out and sorted too.  The approaching rhythm of the mundane is marching back into line.

Maybe I just do better with mundane faithfulness.

Baby Avacado!

I made it!  I got the baby avocado and baby quilt made before the baby shower!  Phew! 

The beautiful mama-to-be loved it...squealed with glee.  I'm so happy!

Everybody tells me I could sell these but I just think it might take the joy out of it for me.  There's something super special about getting to know people and then making something special...just for them...one of a kind!  

3 years of love

Our church has a small seminary with a three year cohort.  At some point, I decided that I was going to make a quilt and lovie for each seminary baby.  This seemed like a great, easily sustainable idea.  I love the seminary wives and faithfully pray for them.  At first there weren't that many wives...or that many babies.  It didn't occur to me that there would be a baby BOOM near graduation.  Man, have I been busy!  But, really, I'm not complaining...I love sewing and these babies and their families.  I'm so excited for how God is going to use them as they go out into the world...and move away...sniff sniff.

 This owl is made from the pocket of corduroy pants.

 This is a bear.  The quilt had gray bears.  But, my son says this looks like a sloth.

 This is a pug...to go with a doggie quilt.  It's also partially curduroy.

 This was a very special llama for a couple who are both MK's.  I like this llama so much I might make one for myself sometime.

 This owl was scope creep, as my husband calls it when I go off task.  He was for a pastor's fourth child because I wanted sew, the baby was so stinking cute and I figured fourth babies probably don't get many handmade gifts.

 This was for a baby in our Faith Group.  I love this fabric!!

 This is a hedgehog...turned out WAY harder to make than I anticipated.  He's made from the shoulder of a sweater I found.  I made dreads outta snipped up, felted sweater.

 A turtle...neck and body from felted sweater.

 A fox...with a tie for a tail.

And my favorite, a cactus...for a sweet couple who lived in Las Vegas before seminary and used to go cactus hunting.

I'm working on my final quilt and lovie before graduation Saturday.  It's also something unusual I've never tried before...an avocado...pictures to come!

Aging: It is not death to die

It seems lately that I am pondering aging quite a bit.  I am dealing with my own middle age...the unfulfilled desires, the dreams that won't be achievable, the search for contentment in Christ alone.  

I'm also blessed (yes, I said blessed) to get to watch my parents deal with the aging process.  With my Dad's cancer and my Mom's TN (Trigeminal neuralgia) I get to watch them live out their Theology and it is an amazing and humbling thing.  As I helplessly watch their struggle with pain, disease and even their own sin in this broken world, I am repeatedly shown God's faithfulness and that He.is.enough.  

AND...I also am experiencing the awful, awful world of dementia as my grandparents struggle and I prepare to visit them and love them well.  I've been perusing blogs on this subject and thought I'd share them below.

Alzheimer's, the Brain, and the Soul-  "To prepare for memory loss, read the Bible, pray, and sing every day — and tell loved ones about your disciplines."

7 Resolutions for Aging and Dying Well- AND 8 Resolutions on Aging-  These ones probably spoke most to what I've been struggling with...my own sinfulness and the fear that I will dishonor God in my old age...when my mind goes.  I need to resolve some of these things...now.

The Dignity of those with Dementia-  "The real test and the real question for me was, Would I patiently, graciously — as if for the first time on the tenth time — answer him with grace and interest, engaging the person who was there in that moment? Such challenges of love are no accident. They are no accident." 

"God didn’t dream that into my life for nothing. That was a painful gift to me and a test. We all will have them, so let us be full of grace as we give ourselves to care for those who have become too weak physically or mentally to care for themselves. God’s priorities for efficiency in this world are not ours."

Retirement Homes or Caring for Aging Parents-  "The main issue for the Christian child of aging parents is not the precise circumstances. The main issue is, are we servants or are we selfish? Are we ready to sacrifice and trust God with the joy to meet every need?"

Amid all of this I like the words to this song...It is Not Death to Die...

Winsome Wednesday: Believe without touching the scars...

Today I was listening to a new ZOE group album I'd found on Amazon Prime Music.  

A line from the song The Bread Has Been Broken caught my ear..."Believe without touching the scars."  I thought...Poor Thomas... imagine being the guy known for being loyal but a total pessimist...full of doubt.

I decided to take a look at it...

John 20: 24-29

"Now Thomas, one of the twelve, called the Twin, was not with them when Jesus came.  So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord.” But he said to them, “Unless I see in his hands the mark of the nails, and place my finger into the mark of the nails, and place my hand into his side, I will never believe.”

Eight days later, his disciples were inside again, and Thomas was with them. Although the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.” Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here, and see my hands; and put out your hand, and place it in my side. Do not disbelieve, but believe.” Thomas answered him, “My Lord and my God!” Jesus said to him, “Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.”

I'd never considered the importance of this story being there...how it shows that the disciples weren't a bunch of gullible dopes who made up or dreamed the resurrection accounts.  Frankly, most of the stories about them surrounding this time aren't flattering to them in any way.  I mean, they all abandoned Jesus!  And, this story shows that Jesus kinda had to convince them of his resurrection.  They were reluctant to believe even with the evidence they could see.  Without the account of doubting Thomas this passage wouldn't mean as much...

1 John 1:1

"That which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we have seen with our own eyes, which we have gazed upon and touched with our own hands--this is the Word of life."

But the line of song is right too...We are so blessed to be granted faith to believe.

1 Peter 1:8

"Though you have not seen Him, you love Him; and though you do not see Him now, you believe in Him and rejoice with an inexpressible and glorious joy, now that you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls."

I also treasure Jesus' tenderness and compassion toward Thomas...offering him proof, instead of a rebuke.  I know I too have a doubting heart...I am tempted, as Eve, to doubt God's goodness.  I am so glad that I can run to my Savior with every doubt and be received with love and compassion...and proof from His Word of all He is!

Isaiah 43:1-4

Now this is what the LORD says—

He who created you, O Jacob, 

and He who formed you, O Israel: 

“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; 

I have called you by your name; you are Mine!

When you pass through the waters, 

I will be with you; 

and when you go through the rivers, 

they will not overwhelm you. 

When you walk through the fire, 

you will not be scorched, 

and the flames will not set you ablaze.

For I am the LORD your God, 

the Holy One of Israel, your Savior; 

I give Egypt for your ransom, 

Cush and Seba in your place.

Because you are precious and honored in My sight, 

and because I love you, 

I will give men in exchange for you 

and nations in place of your life.