Weary traveler...mundane faithfulness

After a flurry of summertime travels...barely unpacking in time to repack...the actual, looonnnngggg roads of driving...I'm SO tired.  I was more than slightly giddy to discover that the next overnight trip I have to take is at Christmastime.  Hooray!

There's probably something wrong with me.  Don't worry, I'm aware of this.  I need to learn to relax and enjoy the ride more...  Somehow learn to enjoy the disorganization more.  I need to plan relaxing things more.  Too uptight, probably.

Yes, it's good to be home.  The books, cupboards, drawers, clothes...everything is getting hauled out and sorted.  The calendar for the school year is getting filled out and sorted too.  The approaching rhythm of the mundane is marching back into line.

Maybe I just do better with mundane faithfulness.

Baby Avacado!

I made it!  I got the baby avocado and baby quilt made before the baby shower!  Phew! 

The beautiful mama-to-be loved it...squealed with glee.  I'm so happy!

Everybody tells me I could sell these but I just think it might take the joy out of it for me.  There's something super special about getting to know people and then making something special...just for them...one of a kind!  

3 years of love

Our church has a small seminary with a three year cohort.  At some point, I decided that I was going to make a quilt and lovie for each seminary baby.  This seemed like a great, easily sustainable idea.  I love the seminary wives and faithfully pray for them.  At first there weren't that many wives...or that many babies.  It didn't occur to me that there would be a baby BOOM near graduation.  Man, have I been busy!  But, really, I'm not complaining...I love sewing and these babies and their families.  I'm so excited for how God is going to use them as they go out into the world...and move away...sniff sniff.

 This owl is made from the pocket of corduroy pants.

 This is a bear.  The quilt had gray bears.  But, my son says this looks like a sloth.

 This is a pug...to go with a doggie quilt.  It's also partially curduroy.

 This was a very special llama for a couple who are both MK's.  I like this llama so much I might make one for myself sometime.

 This owl was scope creep, as my husband calls it when I go off task.  He was for a pastor's fourth child because I wanted sew, the baby was so stinking cute and I figured fourth babies probably don't get many handmade gifts.

 This was for a baby in our Faith Group.  I love this fabric!!

 This is a hedgehog...turned out WAY harder to make than I anticipated.  He's made from the shoulder of a sweater I found.  I made dreads outta snipped up, felted sweater.

 A turtle...neck and body from felted sweater.

 A fox...with a tie for a tail.

And my favorite, a cactus...for a sweet couple who lived in Las Vegas before seminary and used to go cactus hunting.

I'm working on my final quilt and lovie before graduation Saturday.  It's also something unusual I've never tried before...an avocado...pictures to come!

Aging: It is not death to die

It seems lately that I am pondering aging quite a bit.  I am dealing with my own middle age...the unfulfilled desires, the dreams that won't be achievable, the search for contentment in Christ alone.  

I'm also blessed (yes, I said blessed) to get to watch my parents deal with the aging process.  With my Dad's cancer and my Mom's TN (Trigeminal neuralgia) I get to watch them live out their Theology and it is an amazing and humbling thing.  As I helplessly watch their struggle with pain, disease and even their own sin in this broken world, I am repeatedly shown God's faithfulness and that He.is.enough.  

AND...I also am experiencing the awful, awful world of dementia as my grandparents struggle and I prepare to visit them and love them well.  I've been perusing blogs on this subject and thought I'd share them below.

Alzheimer's, the Brain, and the Soul-  "To prepare for memory loss, read the Bible, pray, and sing every day — and tell loved ones about your disciplines."

7 Resolutions for Aging and Dying Well- AND 8 Resolutions on Aging-  These ones probably spoke most to what I've been struggling with...my own sinfulness and the fear that I will dishonor God in my old age...when my mind goes.  I need to resolve some of these things...now.

The Dignity of those with Dementia-  "The real test and the real question for me was, Would I patiently, graciously — as if for the first time on the tenth time — answer him with grace and interest, engaging the person who was there in that moment? Such challenges of love are no accident. They are no accident." 

"God didn’t dream that into my life for nothing. That was a painful gift to me and a test. We all will have them, so let us be full of grace as we give ourselves to care for those who have become too weak physically or mentally to care for themselves. God’s priorities for efficiency in this world are not ours."

Retirement Homes or Caring for Aging Parents-  "The main issue for the Christian child of aging parents is not the precise circumstances. The main issue is, are we servants or are we selfish? Are we ready to sacrifice and trust God with the joy to meet every need?"

Amid all of this I like the words to this song...It is Not Death to Die...

Winsome Wednesday: Believe without touching the scars...

Today I was listening to a new ZOE group album I'd found on Amazon Prime Music.  

A line from the song The Bread Has Been Broken caught my ear..."Believe without touching the scars."  I thought...Poor Thomas... imagine being the guy known for being loyal but a total pessimist...full of doubt.

I decided to take a look at it...

John 20: 24-29

"Now Thomas, one of the twelve, called the Twin, was not with them when Jesus came.  So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord.” But he said to them, “Unless I see in his hands the mark of the nails, and place my finger into the mark of the nails, and place my hand into his side, I will never believe.”

Eight days later, his disciples were inside again, and Thomas was with them. Although the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.” Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here, and see my hands; and put out your hand, and place it in my side. Do not disbelieve, but believe.” Thomas answered him, “My Lord and my God!” Jesus said to him, “Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.”

I'd never considered the importance of this story being there...how it shows that the disciples weren't a bunch of gullible dopes who made up or dreamed the resurrection accounts.  Frankly, most of the stories about them surrounding this time aren't flattering to them in any way.  I mean, they all abandoned Jesus!  And, this story shows that Jesus kinda had to convince them of his resurrection.  They were reluctant to believe even with the evidence they could see.  Without the account of doubting Thomas this passage wouldn't mean as much...

1 John 1:1

"That which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we have seen with our own eyes, which we have gazed upon and touched with our own hands--this is the Word of life."

But the line of song is right too...We are so blessed to be granted faith to believe.

1 Peter 1:8

"Though you have not seen Him, you love Him; and though you do not see Him now, you believe in Him and rejoice with an inexpressible and glorious joy, now that you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls."

I also treasure Jesus' tenderness and compassion toward Thomas...offering him proof, instead of a rebuke.  I know I too have a doubting heart...I am tempted, as Eve, to doubt God's goodness.  I am so glad that I can run to my Savior with every doubt and be received with love and compassion...and proof from His Word of all He is!

Isaiah 43:1-4

Now this is what the LORD says—

He who created you, O Jacob, 

and He who formed you, O Israel: 

“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; 

I have called you by your name; you are Mine!

When you pass through the waters, 

I will be with you; 

and when you go through the rivers, 

they will not overwhelm you. 

When you walk through the fire, 

you will not be scorched, 

and the flames will not set you ablaze.

For I am the LORD your God, 

the Holy One of Israel, your Savior; 

I give Egypt for your ransom, 

Cush and Seba in your place.

Because you are precious and honored in My sight, 

and because I love you, 

I will give men in exchange for you 

and nations in place of your life.

Z- Zephaniah 3:17 Song

"The LORD your God is in your midst, 

a Mighty One who will save; 

He will rejoice over you with gladness; 

He will quiet you by His love; 

He will exult over you with loud singing."

 

Here's a LINK to the song.  

In this life there are times of tribulation

Hearts are filled with deep despair

Heartache and pain and troubles abound

Is there comfort anywhere?

In your times of trial

lift your eyes to the Father above

He alone is the answer

the source of peace and love

He will quiet you

He will quiet you

He will take delight in you

And quiet you with his love

His plans for you are perfect

And all his ways are best

He will give you rest

As He quiets you with his love

He longs to take you into his arms

And gently shelter you

Only he can calm the storms in your life

And give you peace anew

And he will rejoice

He will rejoice over you with singing

He will rejoice

He will rejoice over you with singing

The Creator of all will lift up His voice

And over your life

He will sing and rejoice

He will rejoice

He will rejoice

He will quiet you

He will quiet you

He will take delight in you

And quiet you with his love

His plans for you are perfect

And all his ways are best

He will give you rest

As He quiets you with his love

Come to him for rest

Let him quiet you with his love

His love

His love

His love

Y- Yearly Goals

I am very happy with the bullet journal page I created for my 2019 resolutions.  I am pleased with how well I'm doing this first four months.  Doing this post is perfect timing to revisit them.  I need to be a bit more diligent with the water only.  I have kept my resolution not to post on facebook and keep limits on it....and Netflix.  I have also been diligent to exercise 3-5 times a week.  I'm not seeing results as fast as I'd like but that's just one of those things.  Health is the goal.  I'm glad I re-read the listening goals.

I'm stopping this crazy temperature scarf project.  For one thing, I am so far behind it's ridiculous.  The other thing, I don't like it knitted.  There's not enough definition between the rows...which is important in a project like this one.  I am putting all the yarn away for another year.  I will restart it with crochet...someday.

X- X-mental floss

My original thought was to use this article from mental floss...40 Words That Start with X...to research and come up with an ideas for this x letter blog but honestly, I'm tired and my allergies are bad SO....it'll just be more interesting to link you to the article.

I wish I could remember these words when I'm playing scrabble.

W- Warp and Woof

Today is a reposting of a blog I wrote in 2012....

It's what came to mind when I got to W.

WARP AND WOOF

V- Video Share

So, today, if Youtube works properly....I'm going to share some favorite videos.

I love watching this group split and sing parts.  This is more of an instructional video.  Generally, he just uses hand signals to indicate what he wants them to sing!  Heaven's gonna be awesome ya'll..."Better is One Day in Your Courts than Thousands Elsewhere!!!"


I was shown the following video by a college student friend.  How it was captioned cracks.me.up!
BUNNIES CAN FLY...PROOF!


This one cracks me up.  If you don't appreciate sarcasm and satire...I'm sorry ahead of time.  We attend a church that is working hard with old and new styles...and we have encountered some of the issues brought up in this video.  I feel blessed that our pastors are careful about what we sing...and what we are learning and teaching in song.

U- Umbrella Quilt Idea

I've had an idea for an umbrella quilt for years now.  I should have bought fabric when umbrellas were popular.  Now it seems to be more llamas and cacti.  

Ooooo...llamas and cacti...wait, wait....focus, FOCUS!!!

I have big pieces and little pieces...

Very different in style...

I want to incorporate this paper-piecing.  I started this a long time ago because I wanted to learn English paper piecing...I decided to do rainbow colors to remind myself of God's promises.  It turned out being really difficult.  I'm not super pleased with the workmanship...which stalled the project out.  Maybe I'll make it the border of the umbrella quilt.  

It also irritates me that some of the stars spin one way and some spin the other...and I do NOT want to rip them apart to fix it.  Sigh...

T- Topped Off

I've been thinking a lot about something a friend said this week.  She said, "So often, I think I'll just "top off" me with God and call it good enough.  And that's really just so wrong.  I should be so full of God that there's no room for any of my selfish desires and pride."  Then, someone else in the discussion said her comment in reverse..."God "topped off" with me."  And the more I studied this week I realized how skewed all of us view this topic on most mundane days.    

We've been studying about Moses...and our discussion stemmed from a question regarding how the filling of the tabernacle with God's glory and presence affected Moses...and how we could apply that to our lives.  Well, Moses couldn't enter the tabernacle.  Which in a lot of ways surprised me...I mean, he just saw God pass and this is God's friend and the dude with the glowing and radiant face.  

But maybe, it wasn't about Moses anymore....it was a picture of what Jesus would do for all of us.  How He would pay for my sins and then the Holy Spirit would come...and tabernacle within us!  It has always been His desire to dwell with His people and for them to worship Him alone.

The truth is that when we are filled with the Spirit there is NO ROOM for our selfish desires.  It's not about me, or Moses, anymore.  It's all about worshipping God.  He is transcendent...way beyond our understanding.  But He is immanent...pleased to dwell near us, among us and to be our God.  

And then I thought, Wow...the Holy Spirit is the very presence of God, not merely a symbol of God.  He doesn't just hover over us in a cloud...He is with us...INDWELLING us!  At first, I was thinking I'd prefer a cloud to show me where to go...but God did not give me less...He gave more!  The Holy Spirit protects and guides me.  He helps me understand and obey what I read in God's Word.  

When God guides me it means there's a goal for the journey.  I start and stop and change my mind a thousand times (ask my husband!)  People disappoint me...and I disappoint them and myself.  God NEVER does!  He always finishes what He begins....and He will be faithful to complete the work of salvation in me and complete it!  (Phil 1:6)

Oh Lord, 

Thank you for your faithfulness.  Thank you for the Holy Spirit to help point me to repentance and to conform to the image of Christ.  Thank you for your protection and guidance.  Help me to daily focus on living in Christ alone.
Amen.

S- Seder Dinner Reflections

What is a Seder Dinner?  The Seder is generally a meal celebrated with family and friends around the time of Passover or Easter.  In Jewish homes, it is usually a huge feast with food, games for the kids and a time to retell the story of the exodus from Egypt.  There is a specific order to the service and meal that includes what is eaten and the order that the story is told.

There are differences in how the Seder is celebrated in the Jewish faith and the Christian faith.  My experiences are from the Christian point of view.  

I found these pictures of a Seder we did just with our little family many years ago now.  The kids were little and I remember that Emma took a giant bite of horseradish with her Haleel Sandwich.  She turned bright red and cried.  She still remembers that it represents sharing in Jesus' sufferings and the contrast of the Charoset to show the sweetness of Jesus' resurrection. 

Obviously, when Jewish and Christian traditions/teachings collide there are certainly big variances. Overall, we love the symbolism and chance to tie the Old and New Testaments together.  Generally, I make roasted lamb with a beautiful side salad.  The other elements are more symbolic than filling.  

We decided we wanted to do this annually when we were expected Emma and attended a church Seder led by a local Hebrew professor.  It was much more involved than the one we usually do as a family...but it was so rich with meaning.

I really love Ellen's post on Seder.  There are a few other good ones but hers is especially thorough and she helpfully shares NT references to tie things together.  

The Seder meal consists of:

• Birkat Ha’Ner – Lighting of the Candles
• Kaddesh – The Cup of Salvation (John 15:1-8) Grape juice since  we do not drink
• U-r’chatz – Washing of the hands (Exodus 30:18) Done  in our congregation by our teens
• Karpas – Rebirth & renewal (Psalms 126:5) Parsley or hyssop dipped in salt water
• Yachatz – Breaking of Bread (Luke 22:19) Unleavened bread (Matzoh)
• Maggid – The Cup of Deliverance (John 8:32) Grape juice
• Rachtzah – Second washing of hands & blessing of meal
• Motzi – Blessing for the bread (Luke 22:19)
• Matzah – Break, share, and eat the bread (1st Corinthians 11:23-24) The Communion bread
• Maror – Bitter Herbs (for us scallions) with Charoset (a mixture of nuts, fruits,and herbs) Represents the bitterness of life before Christ and the antidote (Christ)
• Korech –
  • The Haleel Sandwich. Represents Jesus’ sacrifice on Good Friday and His resurrection on Sunday.  You put horseradish on one end of a broken Matzah and Charoset on the other end. You eat as much of the horseradish as you can tolerate before eating the Charoset.  Note, it’s particularly fun to watch your son take a HUGE bit of the horseradish and turn purple during this part of the Seder.
  • Eating of the Egg.  A hard boiled egg (or deviled egg for some) represents the suffering and oppression in Egypt. Everything else in water softens but the egg gets harder, like the Israelites. It also symbolizes the new life we have in Christ.
  • Explanation of the shank bone (of a lamb). Reminds us that there was blood sacrificed to save our lives (Hebrews 9:22)
• Shulchan Orech – Eating the Lord’s Supper. For us, a communal potluck where everyone brings a dish to share.
• Tzafun – Earlier in the ceremony, part of the broken Matzah is hidden (the Afikoman).  At this time, the children search for the Afikoman. This symbolizes Jesus’ resurrection from the dead.  Those who find him have riches of everlasting life. It’s also the time when the children receive a ton of Easter candy and run around and play in our service.
• Barech – The Cup of Elijah (Luke 22:20) When Jesus drinks from the cup never drank from before. It is the new covenant that represents Jesus’ blood, that was shed for us.
• Hallel – The Cup of Joy (Revelations 19:9) Represents the marriage we look forward to in Heaven.
• Nirtzah – The Song of Praise (Revelations 21:3) All is accepted. Blessed is He who comes in the name of the Lord!

R- Redeeming the Time

"Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, 

redeeming the time, because the days are evil."

 Ephesians 5:15-16

This passage speaks mainly about the need to make use of every opportunity to share the gospel.  How we live and what we value does say something about us.  How we participate with Technology in particular can create opportunities or deter opportunities for meaningful relationships.

Our family has been trying to be very deliberate about the use of our time.  We are genuinely very busily involved with our church and community.  By now everyone with opposable thumbs realizes the time suck that is Technology.  

I have read a few great books on this lately.  12 Ways Your Phone is Changing You by Tony Reinke and  The Tech-wise Family by Andy Crouch.  I also enjoyed a Podcast Q& A with Tony Reinke.  All of these were great resources I would highly recommend and just plain good to think through.  

For our family, there is no screen time during the week, outside of school or work.  

We are charging devices downstairs in the kitchen charger station now.  This was a hard change but super helpful.  I actually got this idea from Crazy Busy by Kevin DeYoung.  He mentions how when we do not separate from technology it's like being in a room with millions of people who can poke you at any time.  I felt the truth of this heavily and really enjoy the freedom of being away.  

I will say that occasionally my husband and I  break this rule to read something on our kindle's...but it is still good accountability for us to have the rule.  It is so easy to seek comfort and numb out with stupid things in the evening instead of communicating and loving those around you.  It has definitely strengthened our marriage to talk to each other and not just stare into a screen.

We time the amount of time spent on devices even on weekends.  It's kind of taken the place that Saturday morning cartoons used to have in my childhood.  Our son loves his hour of time playing with DadE!  

I still love technology for long car rides...but I'm going to try to get back into reading aloud during car trips again.  We were talking the other day and the kids requested I bring back some of the car games I used to "make them" play too.  The specifically requested "Would you Rather?" and "I'm thinking of an animal."  I love that they are excited about it!  

We don't watch much TV.  I like it for noise if I'm alone during the day...but even that I've traded in for Podcasts lately.  We rarely Youtube because you can't control the ads...and some are scary/raunchy!  We occasionally watch an old show like Gilligan's Island or Green Acres on a busy evening...especially if Daddy's traveling and we need a distraction.

Q- Quilting Projects

I am working on an I- Spy quilt.  It has something like 160 different novelty prints in it.  I'm now attaching the gray strips.  It took me so long to get the fabrics collected cut and put together in twos that I've kinda of stalled out.  I'm hoping to get back into it when I go visit my Mom this summer.

 I saved this green fabric for years.  I decided to cut into it a few years ago, choosing a disappearing pinwheel pattern.  This is a lesson is always, always, always take notes on your projects.   I moved and this got boxed up and I have no idea what the measurements are for cutting the pinwheels into nine patches.  I think I will just have to make a dummy one out of some other fabric to figure it out.  I'm hoping to get back into this project too because I do love it and have all the large pinwheel squares sewn.

I do have a picnic quilt I'm binding off.  It is actually one of of my first projects.  I bought cheap, over-dyed fabric and it perforated and tore.  My Mom helped me repair it and even though it isn't the greatest workmanship I decided to finish it and take it on picnics.  

P- Pondering on Piper Prayer quote

“One of the great uses of Twitter and Facebook will be to prove at the Last Day that prayerlessness 

was not from lack of time. 

― John Piper

I find this quote above very convicting and heartbreaking.  I want to grow in prayerfulness this year and always.  I want to be a good example to my children and my friends.  I have found some helpful tools for praying this year.

My husband and I have always studied God's Word together and we pray throughout the day but it's never been first thing (mornings are so busy) and often it got crowded out.  We were challenged by an older couple we greatly respect to start reading and praying together each morning.  It has meant sacrifice.  I am now getting up at 5:30 AM (which often feels like death in case you're curious).  I'm having to be self disciplined in going to bed on time.  We've been using Prayermate to organize our prayer requests.  I really love this free app.  It adds in Scripture to pray and gives Open Door missions requests.  It shuffles up all the lists you make and gives you as many to flip through and pray for as you want each day.  We decided 8 was a good start and we alternate who starts, each praying for 4.

Sometimes we still pray before he leaves for work.  Me, traditionally standing on the first stair step to be tall enough to hug.  That time of prayer is more just about the two of us...especially if we have a busy or difficult day ahead.

I enjoy the Echo app for personal use but if you get to where you'd like share groups it does have a fee which is a bummer for me.  I'm cheap!  Same basic idea as Prayermate but without the extras.

The way I pray personally is via journal.  I will tell you that I'm a journal snob.  I love Leuchtturm!  All the colors and styles...the craftsmanship!  *Drool*  I find that writing out my prayers keeps me focus, which is half the battle for me.  It also helps me process better than I do verbally.  Often as I am writing out something I am already correcting or applying God's Word to that prayer.

"We may assent to the fact that we are dependent on Christ, But if our prayer life is meager or perfunctory we thereby deny it."  ~Jerry Bridges

O- Owl be loving you!

Some caffeinated randomness today around the owl theme!

I love owls.  I tend to think of them as dignified and wise animals.  This picture always cracks me up though.  It combines my love of coffee and owls.  Win win!

I've bought owls for my grandpa for years and years.  I'm not sure he wanted to collect owls but he does now.  There is an arts and crafts owl I made when I was little in his study.  It's a square of burlap with a half shell walnut glued to it.  I can't remember how the head was made...but it forms an owl.  I think it's sitting on a twig.  It's cute, and I love that he's saved it all these years.

When I was in high school I got to dissect an owl pellet.  It was fun and so interesting.  I deliberately chose a guy to be my lab partner.  I said something sweet like, "Look, I'm not interested in dating you or anything but I just want a good lab partner."  We ended up at the same college years later and I roomed with his future wife.  He enjoyed teasing me about the unflattering request I'd made for a good grade.  I just couldn't abide another dramatic female partner.  Too much squealing and no learning.  Ha!

I feel like I saw more owls in NY growing up than I do living in IN.  I remember learning that a group of crows in called a murder after I watched an owl murder.  My grandma told me that they gang up and fly after the owl and peck it to death.  She assumed it was because the owls ate their young or disturbed their nests.

Sometimes, I make owls out of scraps of clothing (pockets) for baby plushies with the quilts I make.  Owl be loving you...always!

N- Not sustainable schedule

Although I'm very happy I have taken this challenge I am also very aware that blogging every day is just NOT a sustainable schedule.

(To be perfectly honest, much of the time I have been writing ahead and post scheduling to accomplish posting each day.  I don't know if that's cheating, or disqualifies me, but there it is.)  

This has been a good exercise in thoughtfulness.  Thinking in 'blog'...looking at life with fresh interest.  I should probably regularly evaluate my whole life's schedule.  Does it contain enough margin.  If I am going to challenge myself in some area...how will I need to adjust other areas to accomplish that goal.

In future...after we all survive to Z...I will probably try to blog three times a week.  It will still allow me the cathartic exercise of writing and help me to organize my thoughts.

M-Marriage

Originally, I had thought to write about my own marriage and how it has changed over the years.  I thought I'd write about our challenges and how we're growing.  But, I decided sharing some of these articles that have helped us might be more beneficial.  I may write that blog someday...but not today.

Nine Words for Every Marriage-  I was wrong. I am sorry. Please forgive me.

Restore the Sweetness to Your Marriage- This article talks about our tendency to view our spouse as a partner of productivity.  Life is busy.  The author gives practical ways to slow down and restore the sweetness to marriage.

Life Her Chin with Love-  My husband appreciated this article.  It helped me articulate some of my insecurity so that he could be a better encourager to me.

Tips for Teaching Kids About Marriage-  "Children need to understand that marriage isn’t what we think it should be. Marriage is what God says it is."