What I am about to share may burst a few bubbles out there. I find being a Domestic Engineer...HARD. Yes, I know it's difficult...that's not what I mean. I don't particularly like it most days. I find it mind numbing and not in a good way.
I do understand how women *snap* and run away or kill people. "But for the grace of God, go I"...and I mean that as NO JOKE. For those who can read between the lines of my blog...these last few months have been VERY hard for me. Often, Satan likes to whisper in my ear that I'm failing in every one of life's roles...daughter,wife, mother...Thankfully, God leads me to His Word and shows me...
Isaiah 43:1, "Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine."
Jeremiah 29:11, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
But last night, as I was crying about life in general...okay and the stupid crab apple jelly/syrup...it occurred to me that I set up all these plans and goals for myself and then get upset and bent out of shape when I don't meet them. AND here's the funny part...no one knows about them but me.
Yeah, I create things for myself to do...cuz just doing laundry, wiping noses and bottoms, cleaning floors and bathrooms ad nauseum makes me quite looney. I often forget to ask God along the way...if ANY of it is His purpose for me. And as my WFW selection points out...I can have any old plans I want...but only the LORD's plans prevail.
My dearest daughter is currently on a kick of wanting to know what is coming next...especially as her birthday approaches. "What's next MomE?" is driving me berserk. It occurred to me that I sort of do that with God though...I'm so impatient. I'm not content with his plans for me...and I add and plump up plans of my own. What's next.. what's next? I was reminded via hymn...that I need to view life Moment by Moment...
Moment by moment I’m kept in His love;
Moment by moment I’ve life from above;
Looking to Jesus till glory doth shine;
Moment by moment, O Lord, I am Thine.
How about you? Have you checked to see if today's plans are just a bunch of YOUR plans or are they God's plans?? BIGGER QUESTION: Can you rest content in His plans for you?
My Dad's post, Perfectionism is Next to Godlessness...really harmonized with my thoughts today. My favorite excerpt...
"God is less interested in my perfect completion of some project than He is in His perfect completion of ME. What I suppose are perfect successes are often failures because they inflate my pride, or they take inordinate amounts of time that should have been spent elsewhere, or they are accomplished through ungodly attitudes or actions. What looks like failure, on the other hand, may be God's success if it contributes to my humility, patience, and growth in grace."