Word FILLED Wednesday: Knock, knock...

Hearts Entrusted...

Parenting isn't for the faint of heart. I share regularly about my failed attempts at being super Mom...of not doing all I should...could... I was thinking of this verse,
Romans 7:15 "For what I am doing, I do not understand; for I am not practicing what I would like to do, but I am doing the very thing I hate."
While I am, much of the time, a dynamic, excited, loving and creative mother...such a passionate and perfectionist personality also leads me to be a very angry, explosive and picky mother...much much more often than I'd like to admit.
I'm beginning to teach my sweet girl her opposites. Day, night. Light, dark. On, off. Up, down. I was reading in Psalms 145:8,
"The LORD is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and rich in love."
Oh no, I felt like crying...I'm being an opposite. I'm slow to love and rich/full in anger. In attempts to create "order" I bark out commands...and demand so much that isn't even really...necessary. What would happen if I took a big 'ole chill pill? Would creativity abound? More importantly...would God's love abound?
I wanted to re-post this poem I posted a long while back...about anger...cuz, even back then I was worried about it's control over me.

I am my child's Bible study...they see Christ through me...How I act...Who and What I'm controlled by are extremely important!

Hearts Entrusted
These tiny hearts to me entrusted,
Soft and tender,
Pockets of soil moist with innocence,
Laden with surprises,
Giggles,
Questions,
Love,
With one blast of anger,
One word unkindly spoken,
One glare of intolerance,
I can cause these tiny hearts to...
Fear,
Cower,
Or---God forbid-
Hate.
I want to plant within their souls seeds of...
Joy,
Contentment,
Love
heaping
upon
love.
Yet, thorny briers of...
Harshness,
Impatience,
Bitterness,
I have heedlessly allowed to grow.
Remorseful?
Yes.
Able to call back?
Never.
Forgiven?
Oh yes, more than I deserve.
Lord, I don't want to fail again.
May I be found faithful to these created by You.
Praise for A-B-Cs perfected,
"Thank you," for windows cleansed with Pledge.
There are no second chances.
I cannot undo the past.
Jesus,
Sear my heart with love and devotion.
May I be a sower of seeds,
A shelter amidst the storm.
May I hear,
"Well done, good and faithful mother."
May I be found true.

Written by Julie Ann Barnhill
-The fabulous author of "She's Gonna Blow; Real Help for Moms Dealing with Anger."
Read it. Truly life changing for any angry moms out there!

Memory Monday: Whatever you do....

Col. 3:17 "And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him."
Oooooo....look they're matchy again! Yeah, no mistakes again! I've been giving the kids a verse too...and we practice them at lunchtime. It's really working well. I'm going to try to video them with their verse for next week! It's so cute to hear them say their version of Corinthians 5:7!
COLOSSIANS 3:17
"And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him."

Caffeinated Randomness: FALLing thoughts...

Why is it that I always forget that Fall is a pretty rainy season? I must block that out since I only seem to remember all the brisk, bright days instead.

I also forget the sniffly allergy/cold season...ugh! Yup, I'm fighting another cold or something. Good news...I think I'm winning. A big thanks to a wonderful husband who doesn't complain that housework isn't getting done and that I'm less than helpful lately. He even got up with our teething munchkin last night. Wonderful man, my Loverbrains.

My big randomly flitting questions is should we go to an apple farm this weekend...or should we make sure we get the gutters fixed and covered. I want to do the farm...but we probably should do the gutters. Ugh...sigh!

Okay, last random thought...I love the picture above. I found it online...and want to walk into it! I want to be sitting in the boat taking the picture! Ahhhh! Actually, I'm going to FALL onto the couch right now...and go to this little happy place in my head...zzzzzzz!

HAPPY FALL YA'LL!!

WFW: Where does your strength come from?

Join the many others inspired by Word-filled Wednesday...

Monday: Cool, Calm and collected...and Cquoteable...

One of my fast becoming favorite bloggers, Critty Joy...does a quoteable post now and then...I had to join the fun somehow...so I thought about my Memory Monday verse..and my love for alliteration...calm, cool, collected, and Cquoteable...hehehe!

Proverbs 17:27, "She who restrains her words has knowledge, And she who has a cool spirit is a woman of understanding."

Whoohoo...no mistakes!

Yes, I changed it to feminine form for myself...Here's the original! Proverbs 17:27, "He who restrains his words has knowledge, And he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding."NASV

Frazzled...html issues...

If any of you are wondering...

I was playing around with my html

...cuz you know I like to do that from time to time

...and I sort of lost two blog lists.

I lost the Spiritual Sanka and Taster's Choice...argh! The Spiritual Sanka I remembered most of...but know I'm missing someone...if it's you...speak up! Taster's Choice...(for those who haven't figured it out yet) is where I let new blogs sit and be "tasted" before I commit to putting you in a category or keep reading or you don't fit in one of my categories. I know, I'm so zany...hehehe!

So, please don't be mad if you were in my blog list and you think I'm snubbing you now

...cuz I'm not

...I'm just not a great graphic designer...I'm just CHEAP

...and um, things happen!

Caffeinated Randomness: Meme Pastimes.

I pulled this meme from Stray Thoughts .

Who was your first “best friend”?
The first one I remember is Jennifer. We lived next door to each other from second grade til my junior year when I moved away. We still make sure we see each other briefly when I'm in NY.

What was your most memorable birthday as a child?
I remember my ninth birthday very well. I had my party in the hospital where my Grandma was recovery from major surgery. I got a washable Cabbage Patch kid...and I named her Ruth...after Grandma. I think I was afraid she'd die. She's still around...and knows my two wee ones. See, happy ending to my memorable birthday.

Who was your first “crush”?
I really liked the little neighbor boy. He was a bit of a "player" even at a young age. I laughed really really hard when I was told he went into the priesthood.

Where was the best vacation your family took as a child?
We always went to see relatives...and I loved it!!!

What was your favorite pastime as a child?
Reading. Reading. Reading. (Came across my bookworm pin the other day...won it in some contest...Mom, do you remember?)

When did you learn to ride a two-wheel bike?
I don’t remember learning. I do remember hours of riding around in the church parking lot (my Dad was the pastor...so I lived in the parsonage...for those who are confused). I remember when my boundaries increased...very exciting stuff. It's funny now...that I feel terrified thinking about letting my kids ride out of my sight.

What is your most traumatic memory as a child?
I had a great childhood. I can't really think of anything "traumatic"... My Dad was a huge tease (okay, he still is)...and he used to hide at the bottom of the stairs where the church and parsonage connected...and when he'd hear me coming with his lunch or cookies...he'd hide and jump out and scare the boogers out me. I'd scream! Once he made me cry...and he felt bad...and I guess, that was sort of traumatic! Once, I ran through a nest of yellow jackets playing follow the leader with all the neighbor kids and we ALL got stung! That was traumatic to some...and hilarious in retrospect!

What age did you learn to swim?
I was well into my teens. I always sank like a rock...really! I still have to work to tread water. I dive really well though!

What smell automatically takes you back to your childhood?
Flavored chapstick. I used to eat it... True story...when my Dad was candidating my Junior year of high school I asked him if I could please use his chapstick. He said, "No, you eat it." I adamantly told him that I most certainly did not do that anymore. My Mom backed me up!

What was your first pet?
We got a mutt when I was six. She was black and white spotted. I named her Spots...very creative name don't ya think? She was the best dog ever...her only fault was she shed a lot!

Who impacted your life as a child?
My family has been a huge impact in my life. I spent summers with my Dad's parents...and feel like I've gotten a lot of good spiritual advice from them throughout the years.

What is the most exciting Christmas gift you received as a child?
An alarm clock...yup, I was a control freak...even as a child!

Who was the neighborhood bully when you were growing up?
I remember some mean girls in high school...but no one really before that. I've always been a "walking my own path" kind of kid. I couldn't be bothered.

Who was your best friend as a teenager?
I had some good friends at the church youth rallies. Naomi and I sang duets together. Again, I was a more of a social butterfly. I was friends with everyone...not just one. I do remember enjoying friendships with boys more than girls. Until I got married that was probably true to a point. I find groups of women catty and cliquey...even today.

What is the first car you can remember your family owning?
I remember the Chevy...that was light blue with white plastic seats...that made bumps on your bare skin in the summer. I think that's the furthest back I remember.

What was the first award you ever received?
I won the spelling bee in fourth grade.

What is the name of the first sports team you played on?
I never played on one other than P.E. I was more academically minded. I enjoyed field hockey!

Gossip Feathers...

My name is Gossip.
I have no respect for justice.
I maim without killing.
I break hearts and ruin lives.
I am cunning and malicious and gather strength with age.

The more I am quoted the more I am believed.
I flourish at every level of society.
My victims are helpless.
They cannot protect themselves against me because I have no name and no face.

To track me down is impossible.
The harder you try, the more elusive I become.
I am nobody's friend. Once I tarnish a reputation, it is never the same.
I topple governments and ruin marriages.
I ruin careers and cause sleepless nights, heartache and indigestion.
I spawn suspicion and generate grief.

I make innocent people cry in their pillows.
Even my name hisses.

I AM CALLED GOSSIP.

Author Unknown from Virtual Christian Magazine
____
Lauren posted a great blog about gossip being like feathers...over where she's Walking By Faith. It made me think of this poem that I first posted April 4, '08. It doesn't hurt to be reminded. Please pray for me--I'm still having issues on both sides of this fence. Words are so powerful--negatively and positively. THINK before you speak.

WFW: My Beloved's Home!

After Loverbrain's being away on business...now that he's home...this week when I took time to assemble my WFW post...I was thinking romantical thoughts. To quote Monsters Inc.'s Mike, "Think romantical thoughts. You and me, me and you, both of us together!"

SOOOO HAPPY!!!!!!!!

Wanna hear my funny little song? (Think yodel style)

He's home, he's home. My Loverbrains, the DadE, the man is home! Whoo, hoo, hoo!
Mama went shopping all alone...whoo, hoo, hoo!
The little boobahs are happy again...whoo, hoo, hoo! Yiphee!

Tube Tuesday: James 3: A Story

I saw this on It's Almost Naptime's Blog...and just had to use it for Tube Tuesday. It convicts me...I'll be honest...how 'bout you?

Happy Memory Monday!!

"I will give thanks to You with all my heart, I will sing praises to You before the gods." Ps.138:1

"I will give You thanks with all my heart; I will sing praises to You before the gods." Ps. 138:1

Close but not quite. I can't believe I messed up the singing part! I wanted to memorize this because of a message our pastor did recently on putting God before any other idols. It has struck me lately that my attitude about various things is just as much an idol as any object. I feed those bad feelings, I choose them over God's ways, etc. I want to remember to give Him thanks and praise before any of the gods in my life. I want them to go away!

Join the gals over at The Simple Wife....here.

Yes, I'm happy today too...cuz tonight my sweet Loverbrains will be home....woohoooo!

Discovery in the Waiting...

I haven't been as good about blogging as I thought I'd be this week.

I've discovered that I am not cut out for single parenthood...in any way, shape or form. I'm very happy that this is true. We are not complete without "the DadE."

I've discovered my whimsy comes from my security. I had visions of multi blogs floating in my head...with many little faces and cutenesses. I did get some good shots...but mostly I just muddled my way through.

I've discovered I can't sleep well without my Loverbrains...in fact, I've thought about recording the sound of his breathing for the next trip...cuz it's just too quiet!

I've discovered that toddlers just miss DadE...they don't really get the whole phone concept. It's strange.. if you can hear his voice...where is he anyway?

I've discovered how much I really love my man...and how much I take for granted. I feel in a strange way that I'm falling in love all over again. He write me long e-mails...and I love that.

I've discovered (okay, remembered) how much I detest taking out the garbage...ugh, it's heavy and stinky...ewwww! Speaking of which I better stop telling you what I've discovered and go haul the dog gone things to the shed.

Keep praying for us...two more sleeps until we see DadE...Lord willing, and the plane flies right...

(Awesome button graphic at top is from All You Have To Give...she rocks!)

Caffeinated Randomness: Ask Me Anything...

1. How do I take my coffee? I take my coffee with about a quarter inch of REAL creamer. I try to be polite about milk...but er, it ain't cream! I do love a mean latte made by my greatest chicca Cathy!
2. Shoes or chocolate? I like shoes but I'm cheap...so we'll go with chocolate! My Loverbrains buys me Dove chocolates for every anniversary...because I love the little sayings. I know, sort of lame...but it's always been our thing. I also love chocolate kisses and currently have them stashed in all my candy dishes around the house. Wanna kiss?
   
3. Who do I love to listen to and my favorite song by them? I'm sort of on a calming kick right now. I'm really into The Galkins since they came to our ladies retreat and blew me away. Very Celtic...just beautiful. I think my favorite song is Search Me, O God.
4. You look fabulous - how do you do it? This made me laugh. Thank you dearie... I try! I've recently discovered scarves for my hair...I'm growing it out...and some days the two toddlers and a shower don't mix...so it adds a little class and gets me out the door. I love little blouses too...and feel put together if the shirt has a collar. I heart Yellow...it's a good color for me and it makes me smile!!
   
5. What's my favorite thing about Fall? I love the crispness and the rosy flushed cheeks...the pumpkins and gorgeous leaves. I even love raking with the kids. We have ALOT of raking to do at this house...so it's good I feel that way! They are so excited and "helpful." It's a joy!! (Yeah, yeah...I edited the post and corrected the spelling of R-A-K-I-N-G...which mean to gather leaves with a large fork tool. Hahaha!)
   

Join in with Andrea and us gals over at Under Grace & Over Coffee!

Beginner Violinist...Brace Yourself!

Well, it's almost as painful as listening to a real beginner violinist! I've got skillz people! She is a true lefty...even plays her bottle violin left handed! We went through quite a repertoire before I was allowed to put the camera away. I'll spare you our screechy versions of "Jesus loves me", "Jesus loves the little children" and "Be a Missionary." I'll save them for another day. Blogger takes a loonnnggg time to load up videos...probably why I don't do them more often. Who wants to know if that's a threat or a promise?? Don't you just love the little man and his stringed bass? It's a cross between a drum and a stringed instrument! HA!

WFW--- Eat your broccoli!

I saw this article Patience: the pathway to your promise by Isunji Cardoso in Exemplify and knew what I was going to create for WFW this week. She said that patience was the like the broccoli of spiritual gifts. It was just too funny to me. Somehow it seemed much more "stomachable" to think of patience as broccoli...Something that we've learned to understand is best for us!

Tube Tuesday-- Revelation Song

Memory Monday--In my weakness HE is strong!!

2 Cor. 12:9 But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, and my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore, I will boast even more gladly about my weaknesses, so that God's power may rest on me.

2 Cor. 12:9 "But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me."

My Pastor's wife sang this song on Sunday...and it goes sooo sooo well with this passage. It made me cry...and I'm not a public crier ya'll!

In My Weakness
by Mike Harland and Cary Schmidt 2000 (hear a clip here)

When living life for Jesus Christ becomes too hard a task,
When obedience means sacrifice that seems too much to ask;
That’s when I learn that my own strength isn’t really strength at all,
And I find rest in humbleness when I surrender all.

In my weakness He is strong;
In my need He leads me on.
When I come to the end of all I am,
And I place my trust in Him;
That’s when His strength begins –
In my weakness.

When failures in my human strength have weakened all my pride,
And ruined hopes in fallen dreams have crumbled me inside;
It’s then by grace I fin’lly see the strength of Jesus Christ,
His victory is real in me when weakness fills my life.

In my weakness He is strong;
In my need He leads me on.
When I come to the end of all I am,
And I place my trust in Him;
That’s when His strength begins –
In my weakness.

Checking In!!! Gasp, yes...really!

I know it has been f o r e v e r since I last checked in. APRIL...wow...so sorry! I have been reading...okay, I'm a wee bit behind but I'll catch up...never fear. Since mid April I've read...the rest of Mark, Galatians, 1-2-3 John, Song of Songs, Psalms, 1-2 Peter, Joel, Duet., John, 1-2 Corinthians, Jude, Joshua and I'm mid way through Judges. Yeah!!!
I've been totally engrossed in autobiographies and biographies of various missionaries. A couple we count as an extra set of Grandparents loaned me a whole stack. I've read:
...Vision for God (about the life of Margaret Brand missionary to India for leprosy optical patients with husband Paul)
...Gates of Splendor (if you've seen the movie it's never the same as the book people!!)
...Against All Odds by Jay Walsh (about reaching the native tribes of Bangladesh)
...Green Leaf in Drought (the story of the escape of C.I.M missionaries from Communist China)
...The Valley is Bright by Nell Collins (missionary to cancer patients)
...Tramp for the Lord by Corrie ten Boom (anything by her is inspirational)
I plan to continue with whatever I can get my hands on...it's spiritually challenging!!
I got some neat old sunday school studies from my grandparents basement this summer. They were moldy and damp...but they let me have them anyway. I'm just loving them!!! They are harder than anything that's been written recently. I'm so sick of the fluff in the christian bookstores I could just scream. Sorry, blog for another day...
I also love the answers inside...I think it's either my Grandma or my Aunt's handwriting. She can't remember...I mean, she's only a Godly woman after all...she's only done about a badillion such studies...what's the matter with her she can't remember. HAHAHA! Love you Grandma!

This one starts with Colossians...Putting Christ First. My brief synopsis of what I've learned thus far...I need to put Christ first in my faith, in God's plan for me, and in ministry. The source of spiritual fruit is the Word of the truth of the Gospel. God made everything...things we can see and things we can't...things on earth and in heaven...in all realms of power. He made everything for Himself (his glory). In the spiritual sense Christ is the head...so, he should come first in all things. In order to be presented holy and without blame...I must continue firmly in faith; steadfast. I must not be moved away from the hope of the gospel.

The challenge of course was to put Christ first...they suggested trying it for 24 hrs. That's sort of wrong...you should try it fully EVERY DAY. Doesn't mean you'll succeed. You'll walk in the power of his daily sufficient grace though!

So, I'll try to check in again before the end of the year. Hope you are working hard on your resolutions...and above all that you are reading God's Word! It's soooo important!

Saturday's Dozen Laughs...

#1--I haven't had my coffee yet, don't make me kill you.

#2--If God had wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them on my knees.

#3--I am woman. I am invincible. I am tired.

#4--I'm not a perfectionist. My parents were though.

#5--We can't all be a princess, someone needs to clap when I go by.

#6--Everyone seems normal, until you get to know them.

#7--I'm sorry, was it my job to fill your life with joy today?

#8--My inner child thinks you are a big poopy face!

#9--Napping House: You wake 'em, You take 'em!!

#10--Tact is for people who aren't clever enough to be sarcastic.

#11--Your just mad because a house got dropped on your sister.

#12--Sarcasm, just one of the many services I provide.

Caffeinated Randomness...Watcha Reading??

Thankfully, Andrea came up with a fun form of randomness for today...cuz my brain's full of preparing for my Loverbrains impending trip to China...etc. etc. Preparing the kids, making sticker charts for days til he's back, planning things to do so the time goes by faster...ugh! So, on to the books!!

First up..."Real Moms...Real Jesus" by Jill Savage...I won this on Chrysalis' giveaway...and am devouring it. A lot of good stuff...and providentially well timed for this tired MomE!
Loverbrains and I flew through the first part of this book together...and then sort slowed down. It gets very psychological...which I guess with two Drs. shouldn't be surprising. It still has good points though.
I love this book...and hope it never leaves our night table...ahem *blush*. Spice up your marriage and read this book! Steamy!!!
On a lighter note...I'm totally back into my quest to read all the Agatha Christie books ever written. Hey, I read all (A L L) of the Sherlock Holmes' ever written...and then some.
On an even lighter...brainless...note....I enjoy Joanne Fluke's recipes. Her books are relaxing and not too scary or intense for a mystery. I love the main character...she's fun and desperate and so single and free! This appeals to me...now that I'm not anymore!
PS...Thanks to all who prayed for my little drugged random self last week. We are much improved, thanks muchly! Praise GOD! Being sick makes me a much more thankful person all around.

A Thoughtful Thursday...

Great is thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me

Morning by morning I wake up to find
The power and comfort of God's hand in mine
Season by season I watch Him, amazed
In awe of the mystery of His perfect ways
All I have need of, His hand will provide
He's always been faithful to me.

I can't remember a trial or a pain
He did not recycle to bring me gain
I can't remember one single regret
In serving God only, and trusting His hand

All I have need of, His hand will provide
He's always been faithful to me.

This is my anthem, this is my song
The theme of the stories I've heard for so long
God has been faithful, He will be again
His loving compassion, it knows no end
All I have need of, His hand will provide
He's always been faithful, He's always been faithful
He's always been faithful to me.

Hes Always Been Faithful - Sara Groves

Word FILLED Wednesday...Ruth 2:12

I had noticed passages comparing God to a mothering hen before...but last night at ladies Bible study I noticed this one...and decided I'd use it today! It's a very comforting mental image...and interestingly Boaz was the fulfillment of his own blessing to Ruth. He is a picture of Christ...our Redeemer!

Tube Tuesday: Bless the Lord

You give and take away for my good
For who am I to say what I need
For You alone see the hidden parts of me
That need to be stripped away

And as You begin to refine
I'm learning to let go and rely
On One who walks with me
As hard as it may be

You're teaching me all the while to say
Bless the Lord, O my soul
All that's in me bless Your name
Forget not Your power un-told
Not Your glory or Your fame
For You came to heal the broken
To redeem and make me whole
Bless the Lord, O my soul