Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Stigma & Soli Deo Gloria

I am a homemaker.  I joke about being a Domestic Engineer.  I am NOT unemployed
Last week, when my sweet baby boy hurt his finger, I took him to immediate care.  One of the first questions they ask you is where you work.  FYI, they ask whether you carry the insurance or not.  Why do they need this information?  I said that I was a homemaker.  A few HOURS later when I was asked to sign for my minor child, I read that it said I was UNEMPLOYED.  At that point I was too emotionally drained to take it on...but now that I've churned on it for a week...I have stuff to say.

I am not unlike many other Mom's.  I greatly struggled (and still occasionally do struggle) with the way society treats Mom's who stay at home.  Notice, you won't hear me say that I'm a SAHM...because it feels like a put down to me.  I've heard many people question whether there even is a negative societal attitude towards homemakers.  I believe that my experience is proof.

Saying that I'm unemployed denotes several things.  It suggests that I do not WORK...and that I am LAZY.  I'd just like to see them keep up with my kids and my family.  I earn my sleep at night, ya'll.  It also suggests that whoever is storing this data does not value "the home"...and the making of those homes to society as a whole.  And that's sadly the truth about the world.  They see no value in what I do...therefore, I am as a good as unemployed to them.

I may not earn a paycheck...but I'm storing up lots of treasures in heaven.  If anything...stewing on this a bit has encouraged me to be the BEST Domestic Engineer, MomE, wife, homemaker, SAHM out there.  I want to be sure to build up others like me...who are doing their best...and going uncounted.  I know it can be a depressing stigma...but...

Don't worry...God knows our hearts...He knows what we do in secret...even if the world says we are IDLE and NOT BEING USED.

He is using me...for GREAT things.  How about you?

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope."  Jeremiah 29:11


Maria said...

Bobbie...this post has been very encouraging.

I don't call myself a SAHM...I call myself a Keeper of my home.

Unemployed...I haven't been unemployed...we are always working :)


Anonymous said...

I'm so glad you could choose to be a SAHM. My grandchildren appreciate it and I'm glad I could stay home with you. I love ya, kid! Mom

Joan said...

Bobbi - you are storing up treasures that are priceless. I applaud you and all the other mothers who have made the decision to stay at home.

Visiting from Soli Deo Gloria.


Dawn said...

"I earn my sleep at night, y'all."

It is so true. And you are right to dare to swim upstream, against the worldly current and value the things the world may not.

I was an at home mom, keeping my family and home for 16 years. I do not regret one single minute.

Upstream is worth it, and you definitely sleep better at night.

Barbara H. said...

I think I may have told you before, but I can't remember, that one time my mom said of one of my sisters that she wanted to "sit at home and let some man support her." And I thought, "Is that what she thinks of me?" I don't really think so -- I don't know. But my family did comment on how well my children behaved and the relationship I had with them, and I wanted to point out it was partly because I spent time with them.

Homemakers definitely do earn their living and their sleep! Keep up the good work.

journeytoepiphany said...

Preach it!!!!! Try being a stay at home home schooling mom and have someone call you unemployed...rrrrrr

Tiffini said...

I"ve been a stay at home mom most of my life. I love it - I always say it is my calling.
I so agree with you here. What an encouragement you are and can be to other mom's at home.
Sadly- it isn't an occupation that is valued in our society very much and you can bring that to others...:)

Jen said...

Yay, Bobbi! It's so good to see you here at SDG and you have some powerful, well-stated words here today. I love how you take something that discouraged you and turned it around for encouragement for all of us!

Debbie said...

Oh, my young blogger friend (because I assume you are younger), I have walked your walk for twenty years. It's markedly worse as your children grow, and folks accept even less that you would choose a homemaking lifestyle over that of paid employment.

You just have to know what you know in your heart and forgive their ignorance and close mindedness.

And I'm not saying that because it's easy.

Hugs to you. You have chosen the better choice.